


moonlit shadows

by diemmy



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anbu Hatake Kakashi, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Eventual time skip, Family, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Good Father Shikaku, Hatake Kakashi Needs a Hug, Kakashi learns self love, M/M, Marriage of Convenience, Multi, Not Beta Read, Pre-Canon, Rare Pairings, Shikaku and Yoshino are best friends, Slow Burn, Smart Shikaku, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, They sort out their shit before getting together, Touch-Starved, Unreliable Narrator, fall out, so smart he's dumb sometimes, twice
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-14
Updated: 2020-12-14
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:00:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28067397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/diemmy/pseuds/diemmy
Summary: Two souls on the edge of tipping over finds solitude in each other. Late night strategy planning turns to harmless shogi games. As time pass their late nights slowly seeps over to mornings. Daylight is not as forgiving.or, how it may seem like the right person at the wrong time, but it is the right person at the right time, twice.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Nara Shikaku, Nara Shikaku/Nara Yoshino, Nara Yoshino/Female Original Character(s)
Kudos: 18





	moonlit shadows

**Author's Note:**

> hi there! welcome to moonlight shadows. this is dedicated to the small fandom that is Kakashi/Shikaku.
> 
> I wanted to make a story surrounding the importance of friendship, family and self love. I want Kakashi to be happy, and learn how to ask for help. I figured who else but the Nara's to help him out. I had this idea stuck in my head for awhile so here it is. I also wanted to challenge myself to take two characters that don't really interact, work.
> 
> This story will be divided into two arcs, like the summary hinted at. it will be a story about how sometimes who you really need is a friend. How overtime that friend can grow to be more. 
> 
> Every chapter title will be a song that inspired the chapter. If you want, you could listen to it after you read it. 
> 
> anyways, I do not own Naruto or any of their characters. 
> 
> This is solely for my own enjoyment, and I hope you enjoy it too. (◕ᴗ◕✿) Stay safe and take care. 
> 
> song: happiest year - jaymes young

**chapter one: happiest year**

Waking up never felt so difficult. Blinking his eyes a couple times, the fog lifts away. The sight of sunlight dancing on the ceiling, bright and inviting makes the idea of leaving bed not so agonizing. Shikaku shifts his weight onto his hands, a rush of nausea washes over him. _Ugh._ Sweeping his legs to hang off the side, a glass of water greets him. Using his currently limited brain power, he notes the stain left behind from condensation. 

Bringing it to his lips, he chugs the lukewarm water down. Using the back of his hand, he wipes his mouth. It leaves a rough drag on his hand. _Lip Balm._ Pushing that thought away for later. Shikaku stumbles onto his feet. He has never been so grateful for the lack of companionship. Dragging his feet to the washroom, each step feels like Inoichi’s constant yammering stabbing his head, times ten. He knew he should have dissuaded Yoshino from opening the seventh sake bottle. 

After making it half way, his mind finally catches up to him, letting out an undignified groan. His hands quickly come up crushing his head, ignoring the brief urge to puke. As soothing chakra slowly wash away his regrets. His body slumps, and a breathy sigh leaves him. The remaining four steps are a breeze. Shikaku adds buying Yoshino lunch onto his to do list.

Entering the washroom, he quickly goes through the motion, not sparing a glance at the mirror. He needs to save his energy for later, the stacks of paper awaiting him. How troublesome. Not bothering to check the temperature, he turns it on and steps in. _Fuck._ Despite his clattering teeth, Shikaku can’t bring himself to regret his actions. The freezing water brought him to seventy-two percent awareness. He really wants coffee, well more like he needs it. 

Done, he steps out grabbing the nearest towel, a four day old towel. Damn, he really has been neglecting himself. He can hear Kakashi lecturing him about taking care of himself, it leaves an ache in his chest. Wrapping the towel around his waist, he ventures into his room looking for decent clothing. Now awake, he takes in the sorry state that is his room. 

Shikaku’s too spacious bed is littered with yesterday's clothes. His flak jacket barely hanging on, and deer coat on his spare pillow. He snorts seeing his pants on the floor, what he would pay to remember Yoshino’s reaction. It couldn’t be too bad if she left him water. Then again, she left his blinds wide open. Squinting his eyes, he grabs his usual kimono, looking nearly white in direct sunlight. He bends down to grab the discarded pants. He picks up the empty glass and makes his way to the kitchen. 

His footsteps silent as he passes his son’s room. Thinking better of it, he turns around and peeks in. Watching the nine year old's—nearly ten, oh how time flies by— his chest rise and fall, face smush into his pillow. It gets a chuckle out of him. A knot forms in Shikaku’s stomach. His son is brilliant for his age, too brilliant. He caught the question in his son’s eyes. The side glances he gave after Kakashi left for the night, not bothering to hide his curiosity. Shikamaru’s quiet adoration of the ANBU Captain, always brought a smile to his face; today it made his heart tighten. Forcing his eyes away, he takes in the room. Shikaku adds, take Shikamaru shopping to his list, his son needs more items. Quietly closing the door, he continues his journey for coffee.

Walking down the stairs, he notes Yoshino absences. Ah, she must have slipped out earlier than usual to see her lover. The image of her stumbling down the street with a hangover amuses him to no end. In all the years he has known her, he can confidently guess she tripped four times, at minimum. He briefly entertains the notion of drinking hot coffee on his back porch, under the rising sun, overlooking the herds of deer with a companion. Shikaku dismisses the thought, he’s no longer a teenager with no responsibilities, not that he ever had such freedom. Stepping into the kitchen, he advances to the kettle. 

Letting all worries leave him, he takes a couple deep breaths, filling up the kettle. Resting his hip against the counter, his mind wanders. Kakashi returning to the forefront. He groans, too tired to even stop it. The nagging from last night coming back in full force. He has been unprofessional, bordering on childish to delay their conversation. The mental image of telling Kakashi he can no longer come around, let alone the Nara forest, makes his heart wrench. Kakashi’s face by the river that night flashes before him, what a lovely night it was. 

Water spilling onto his hands snaps him out of his daze. Quickly turning the tap off, he sets it to one side to boil. Now leaning adjacent to it, he rubs at his goatee. He knows he can do it, he has delivered worse news before. Expected of his position, but it doesn’t make it any easier. Tomorrow he decides, tomorrow he will look for Kakashi, he should have returned from his mission by then. With that decided, a weight lifts off his shoulders. One he has been carrying around for a month. The piercing ring of the kettle calming to his ears. Reaching for it he—

A familiar chakra pulses twice. Whipping his head left. Dread fills him. Leave it up to Kakashi to always ruin his plans. A humorous laugh echoes in the kitchen. Reaching for the kettle he sets it aside. He makes his way to the back door. Slipping on black sandals, he heads to the small river. 

The autumn leaves crunched under him, the ripple of water getting closer. Peering ahead through the bare branches, the distant clearing came into view. He estimates it will be another two minutes before he reaches the forest line, and another minute after for his approaching companion to appear. A rumbling sound taunts him, how troublesome. The falling leaves and morning sky now a dull image. The anticipation eats away at him. His earlier resolve dissipated. 

Kakashi is a day early, his mission should’ve taken him seventeen days. Regardless, the Third usually has him there for debriefings. Feeling an incoming headache, he leaves that aside to solve later. Sighing, he steps out of the forest line, the herd of deer peer at him in greeting. Nodding his head in turn. Each step forward begins the slow countdown.

_fifty six, fifty five, fifty four,_

The birds chirp overhead, the flock flying in circles. The herd continues to lap up water, unaffected by the growing knot in Shikaku's stomach. He longs for the cover of night. When did he become such a coward?

_thirty nine, thirty eight, thirty seven,_

His shoulders stiffens, hands clench where they rest in his pockets. His eyes scan the area. 

“You’re being irrational,” he berates himself. Unable to diminish all the possible scenarios flying by. Each getting worse and worse. Scrubbing harshly at his face. The marred skin kept him grounded. 

_thirty one, thirty, twenty nine,_

Continuing closer to the water, the soles of his feet drags, body reluctant to comply. Looking at the bench on his left, instances of two people cloud gazing flicker by. Twisting his already fragile composure. He stops four feet from the stream. He wills his breath even. 

_eighteen, seventeen, sixteen,_

His left forefinger taps a fast rhythm, itching for a kuni. Across the stream a deer locks eyes with Shikaku, the deer slowly retreats. A chain effect begins. Silent as they move towards the shadows. He stares up at the clear sky, it feels fitting. 

_three,_

body shagging,

_two,_

pulse forced steady,

_one._

Disinfectant and linen invade his lungs, he glances up at the jonin on his left, noting his slouched posture and his eye fix upon a stray cloud. The rustling leaves last a beat too long, he internally sighs.

“Beautiful day,” the ANBU captain said, humming under his breath. _Ah so this is how we’re doing it._

“Indeed," Shikaku replies, eyes falling close as his head tilts back, letting the sun bask against his face. "Kimiko was born last night." A warm chuckle fills the clearing, his lips twitch. Peaking his left eye open, he sees Kakashi's lone one staring back. The playfulness shown is a drop too much. Does he know? A soft voice echoes. 

“Maa, a child or a fawn Shika?” A finger tapping against his lips. Even with a mask, Shikaku can tell the barrier was hiding a smile, though fake. “You are going to have to be more specific.” 

That left a sour taste in Shikaku's mouth, reminiscent of intentionally diving into a trap. Any other day he would have gladly indulged Kakashi, but the knot in his chest has not loosen; only growing. As if Kakashi read Shikaku’s mind, the glint in his eye changed, shifting to face the Commander, posture still lazed; his eye spoke a challenge. Daring Shikaku. 

So he does know. Kakashi must have figured it out somehow. He shifts, returning the gesture in kind. 

Seeing the bait that has been set, Shikaku considers his possible moves. He can save them the misery and come out with it, _or_ continue to play the game at Kakashi's pace. Seeing no point in prolonging this, he opens his mouth to say —hesitation. That was hesitation he just saw in Kakashi’s eye. The slight scrunch, and twitch under his eye. A nervous tick Kakashi probably isn’t even aware of. It’s a stab in the chest, a jagged kuni twisting in his gut. Changing his mind, he goes with,

“How troublesome,” he hums. He sees the other shifting his weight to one side. Unnoticeable to the untrained eye. Kakashi winces. That triggers the memory of disinfectant, his eyes drawn to the others left leg. Blind spot, he should have brought—

“Would you have changed your mind?” A gentle voice halts Shikaku. Eyes trailing up to Kakashi’s face, there laid a sincerity he has only seen twice under the cover of night. Nails dug into his palms. The crinkle by Kakashi's eye deepened, a soft sheen contrasting the resignation Shikaku sees peering through. Leave it to Kakashi to bring up another unspoken secret. He almost wants to laugh. Instead dread creeps up his spine. His answer already blaring in his mind. Delaying the inevitable would only cause more pain. With the final piece in his palm, he reluctantly lets it go.

"No, it wouldn't have."

_Blink_

“Hmm, then it doesn’t matter,”

 _Fuck._ Shikaku’s eyes widened.

“Well I would love to stay, but I already made the Third wait for 25 minutes you see... See you around Commander.”

Gasping for air, not sure when he even stopped. Shikaku’s eyes fixate on the leaves swaying through the air, watching as it gets blown away. His pulse slows down, awareness creeping back in. His brain scrambles to make sense of the situation. Of all the possibilities, the one he didn’t think of happened. Also being the worst. 

His laugh fills the clearing. The blue sky mocking him. Running his hair through his damp hair, all Shikaku could think about is,

_His eyes are beautiful._

**Author's Note:**

> hellohello thank you for reading, kudos and comment are greatly appreciated.  
> the next lot of chapters with be in flashbacks so, see you then <3


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